I’m sure you’ve all seen that Subaru commercial where the dad is ticking off a vehicle safety checklist to his daughter who is seated in the driver’s seat. At first glance, he seems to be talking to a cute fidgety toddler. It’s only at the end of the commercial, that you realize he was only seeing her as a toddler and that she is, in fact, his beautiful grown daughter. It gets me every time. Every. Single. Time. That commercial is always followed in our house by tears, nostalgia for years that have not even passed us by yet, and, if she is close enough, a big and usually unwelcome squeeze of Pumpkin.
This morning I had a completely opposite experience. As I’m sorting laundry, I look up and, lo and behold, Pumpkin has draped a sports bra around her neck and is holding a set of car keys in her hand. I felt like her whole life had flashed before my eyes. I was no longer looking at my 19-month old, but at my 19-year old. Granted, I hope when she is 19-years old she is wearing her bra under her clothes and not still chewing on a pacifier (though, at the rate we are going, I can only hope). I should have been prepared for this moment, since it was just yesterday when she asked me for “ca-fee” like “mama.” Bras, coffee, car keys? I don’t even want to guess what’s next. What happened to my BABY?
Not only is she sporting adult accessories, but after our latest bout of sickness and home-boundedness, Pumpkin has been acting somewhat like a spoiled teenager when it comes to television. She does not typically watch much television, though the occasional Mickey Mouse Clubhouse has been known to help mama get some chores done. But when she was so pitifully ill this weekend, the only solace she found was in lying on the couch watching endless episodes of Mickey. She was just so darn sick that I let her. Now, every day when she wakes up and again when we return home from school I hear requests for “Mickeys.” Yesterday morning, while watching Mickey, I could not get her to look at me in the face or answer a question and was forced to turn off the television altogether to get her to listen. Again, I felt like I was dealing with my teenage daughter. Being ignored already? I thought this was the age she was supposed to hang on my every word and think I hung the moon.
And speaking of Mickey, since I have watched oh-so-many episodes of it over the past few days, I have to say, I have psychoanalyzed each and every one of the main characters. You’ve got Mickey, of course. He’s your typical nice-kinda-guy, err, mouse that is the sort of the glue that holds together this motley gang of animated creatures. Then you’ve got his lady friend Minnie. Again, pretty likeable gal, though perhaps a bit on the high maintenance side as far as girls go. Same for Daisy – the female characters are both pretty underdeveloped and mostly just high talking, bow-wearing ditzes. Not exactly the role models for a strong independent young lady, but not totally despicable like Barbie.
Next you have Daisy’s boyfriend, Donald. Now Donald is a jerk. You would never want to hang out with someone like Donald. Aside from the fact that ducks may, in fact, eat mice, he is just constantly griping about everything in that awful incomprehensible quack. He’s pretty selfish and anytime he does actually do something nice for someone he has to be talked into it by the others. Why Daisy is with him I will never know. It is your classic case of nice girl/bad boy and I suspect emotional abuse.
Then you have the dogs, Pluto and Goofy. I still have not yet figured out why one of the dogs actually speaks English and the other one only understands English but is much less “evolved” than the other. The one who does speak (Goofy), is, as his name would suggest, a total dumbass. He is always messing things up, breaking things, losing things, and the likes. Of course, there are those few episodes where he realizes he’s an idiot, threatens to pull a George Bailey until, in true It’s a Wonderful Life fashion the gang rallies behind him to convince him he does really bring something to the table. The truth is he is a dumbass. Probably the reason he is the one dude without a girlfriend yet he never realizes he is a fifth wheel.
Having actually put all these thoughts on paper I realize two things – (1) Pumpkin is growing up and it won’t be long before she is that little teenager I got a glimpse of this morning and (2) mama has been spending way too much time watching Playhouse Disney, maybe it isn’t just Pumpkin who needs the TV break.
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