We survived our first semi-major road trip with Pumpkin to Florida and back and, I must admit, it was not bad at all. In 16 hours of driving, we only had one minor fit and I quickly learned that was a combination of hunger and car sickness. Of course, the fact that Pumpkin was a traveling pro should come as no surprise. First she is Mee Maw's namesake and that apple didn't fall far from the tree. More importantly though, the thing I should quit being surprised about is surprises - I need to just learn to expect the unexpected when it comes to raising kids.
Take this morning for instance, the only thing that I was dreading more than the car trip was the first day back at school after 10 days of non-stop fun and attention. My fears escalated when the first words out of her mouth this morning, when she realized mama was dressed for work and not in "play" clothes, were "no school." We arrive at school and I take a deep breath before I open the car door, expecting a meltdown of epic proportions. Instead, as I'm lifting her out of her seat she says "no mama, Aly do it." She then proceeds to walk into the building, and classroom, without so much as holding my hand. When I open the door she struts halfway across the room and then runs to her teacher and excitedly begins babbling to her about "da beach." I didn't get so much as a "lata gata." The only acknowledgment I did get was from the teacher who said, "I guess she was ready to come back to school."
That goes hand-in-hand with our trip to the quaint little ice cream shop on vacation. On the walk over, I explain to everyone that Pumpkin doesn't like ice cream and isn't that the darndest thing, but oh well we can get her some candy. We all select our flavors and Pumpkin picks out a bag of candy and we sit down to enjoy our sweets. Well, wouldn't you know that Pumpkin proceeds to eat half of her Ganny's ice cream and after every single bite, as if to mock me, says "Aly like it" and "it's goooood."
In addition to learning that I don't know anything and that everything I think I know about my child is probably wrong, I also learned a few other important lessons on traveling (and living, generally) with toddlers:
Lesson 1 - Always have a change of clothes - for both yourself and your child. We weren't even out of the state before this one hit home (or at least, should have). As we are standing in line to order lunch, Pumpkin looks at me from Hubby's arms and asks for "mama." I reached for her just in time for her to bend her little head over my shoulder and puke down my back and into my purse. I was drenched and, although I was able to change shirts, I still smelled faintly like puke for the next 5 hours.
You would have thought I had learned that lesson well enough, but on the way back home we stopped at a rest stop near the Florida border for a "quick diaper change." Assuming the wetness I felt on Pumpkin's bottom was spilled juice, I didn't think to grab any extra clothes. Fast forward to a seriously dirty diaper (and, consequently, seriously dirty pants) and me frantically screaming at Hubby from the bathroom stall while my pantless child lay precariously on the changing table.
And I guess the reason they say third time is the charm is that it took me that long to learn this lesson - on our last bathroom break of the trip, I once again lug Pumpkin to the lady's room completely unaffected by her seemingly wet bottom; only to peel off the pants and immediately recognize the faint smell of urine emanating both from her overflowing diaper and my hip where she had been riding.
Lesson 2 - Judge not. So you may be wondering what we did with pee-soaked Pumpkin. Well, let me set the scene for you. It was raining cats and dogs and we hadn't stopped in hours as a result, but the gas light was on and mama had a little Maggie on her bladder so we decided to pull over at the next available gas station. Nevermind the fact that it was poorly lit, packed, and filthy. I cringe at the sight of all the toothless and shoeless people and their children buying Kools and Icees, as I drag my pretentious self and my adorable angel into the disgusting-before-I-even-see-it ladies' room.
So there we are, Pumpkin bottomless and me without even my purse so that I can pretend to be looking for something for her to wear. It's then and there that I do the only thing I can - I stuff her wet shorts into my pocket and hoist her diaper-clad bottom onto my damp hip and trot her right through the crowd. I am certain that the next car that drove up probably contained a woman terrified to get out at the gas station where there was a crazy lady that smelled like urine dragging around her baby with no pants on. Don't judge me.
Lesson 3 - Blessings are often disguised. Going back to the rest stop dilemma - Pumpkin's stomach issues and my lack of preparation for them added approximately 10-15 minutes to our stop. Considering we were only an hour in and had many, many hours ahead of this, I was annoyed. We finally get back on the interstate only to be met almost instantly with a sea of headlights. Two hours in park later and we're back on the road. Only later did I learn that what had caused the traffic was a fatality accident in which an East bound SUV had lost control, flipped across the interstate and into West bound traffic killing one and critically injuring two. Had we not stopped...or had the stop been as quick as I planned...it could have easily been us. Thank God for dirty diapers.
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